Sexism

Oh, there's still sexism, all right.

I notice it now, over the holidays, when the men
sit around talking or watching TV while the women
clean
cook
and actually
do
WORK.

I'm a woman.
If I don't get up and help,
they'll think I'm rude.

But if I do help, then I give in.

I stand up, walk to the sink, and start scrubbing a plate.

Dying

I'm dying on the inside.

Mostly from the splitting headache and the stress of a history exam tomorrow.

But the real reason is I'm dying
from
life.



D
  y
     i
       n
          g

A day in the life

My life is good.
I have a very, very, very good life.

I just realized this this year.

I was going to list how I am so lucky, but that's not fair to them.



I figured out today that I like two people, one of whom I have a legitimate fear of, for I fear he is going to kill me. The other is really funny and sweet and flirty, but he's that way to everyone. I'm nothing special.



Stress is eating me alive.
I hate you, Dickens.



I am
ATHEIST.
Don't judge me.

Whenever I see someone who's religious, I look at them differently now.


Got asked to the winter ball by someone who can't take a hint. But he called me "really pretty," so that's nice. He bugs me, otherwise.


Friend drama, but not between my friends. Ug. Stop being a hypocrite, I wanted to say, you're the fakey one.



My life is very very good.

Religion

Religion.

It's a topic that drives me insane.

I am atheist, through and through.
I believe in no God.

But religion...
whenever it's mentioned, I feel anger swelling in my chest.

At what?

I have no problem with religious people. All my friends are religious, and I love them.
So what's the problem?

I think it's that people allow themselves to be swayed so easily.
They read the bible, or whatever holy book, and now they believe everything in it.
Or they go to church, or perhaps listen to the pope, and they do whatever the church says.



                                                                                                               walls.
                                                                                                          the
                                                                                                     up
They don't think for themselves! As a logical person, this drives me 
I mean, think about it. Look at the bible. It's filled with unbelievable stories, yet people believe it.
'Cause it's the bible. It's holy.
So if thousands of years ago, I wrote a book about how aliens are dieties and how we should worship them, you would
 believe me? You would worship aliens?

That's a word that bugs me. Worship. I refuse to bow down to anyone. I'm a free person.
 I worship NO ONE. God does not deserve to be worshiped.
He does more harm than good.

Sure, there are good morals in the bible.
 But look how many people were killed for that same bible?
You're saying our "loving" God wants to kill people? I disagree, a real God wouldn't let people kill in His name.

And don't feed me that "we don't always know why God does these things" line. I won't take that crap.


Maybe what's bothering me is religion's air of superiority.
I hate the religions or the people that say that since I don't believe, I need to repent, or go to hell.
I dislike the people who say that even though I don't believe, God still loves me.
I DON'T want God to love me.
I don't believe in God.

I don't understand it! I don't hate religion, and I want to be tolerant of it, even while I'm not religious.

But I'm not!

How do I change this?
It's an internal struggle every time someone brings religion (or politics, different story) up in the conversation.

Help.

The best day

I was playing today.
I am too old to play.
But other people were playing, so I joined in.
It was the best thing I have ever done. I know now I love to play just like any 5 year old.

Oh, it was so fun.

To be 5 again...